Activity 2: Determining the Success of a Conclusion



            About sixteen years ago, my family left Mexico and moved to the United States. I have lived in Albuquerque, New Mexico since then. In school, I learned English, at home I spoke English, and during leisure hours I studied English. Even though many families in Albuquerque use both Spanish and English, my father discouraged my mother and me from communicating with one another in our native language. While I am more Mexican—my papers and my face say so—than American, I have lost that cultural identity and have adapted to the American model. Some argue that the genetic coding of an individual determines his or her identity, but identity is heavily a product of place. I am who I am because I was raised in the United States, speaking English.

            My father spoke to me in English throughout my toddler years and encouraged my mother to do the same. Once I started school, some of my friends spoke to me in both English and Spanish. By then, I was not very good at speaking Spanish. I could have taken Spanish classes, but I choose not to. I started to feel left out of my circle of friends who spoke Spanish at home and spoke a mixture of Spanish and English when we were all together. Eventually, I began to avoid them, because I felt they looked down on me for not being able to speak Spanish. Because I could not speak the language, I was not a part of the culture. I was not a Mexican-American.

            At the same time, my "Standard American" or white friends thought of me as Mexican-American. Some of them spoke Spanish better than I did, and even they made fun of me for not knowing "my language." I decided to be as "American" as I could be. In school, I concentrated on American Literature, American History, and Popular Culture. I resented being born in Mexico to Mexican parents and secretly dreamed of changing my name. I cut off every connection I had with Mexico and Mexican people, submerging myself in American culture. I was not a Mexican-American.

            Today, I regret my choices and mourn for my lost identity. But can anyone judge the choices I made? I believe I was left with no alternative. My father never wanted me to speak Spanish. My friends proved hostile to the fact that I did not. I have adapted to the American model, at least in terms of speaking the official language and learning the culture. I am a product of my culture, but it is one that has placed me outside. My place has put me out of place. I have learned the language and culture only to find that I am not a part of it.



Activity

Read the essay "Place and Identity: Why I Am Not a Mexican-American." As you read the concluding paragraph, click on the highlighted text to see how the writer used some of the Four Time-Tested Closers. Answer the questions below assessing the writer's use of them.

One Time-Tested Closer is the "answer conclusion." This type of conclusion closes an essay that begins with a question by answering that question. Does "Place and Identity: Why I Am Not a Mexican-American" have an answer conclusion? If so, describe how it answers the question the essay asks.




You might also choose to end your essay with a "full-circle conclusion." An essay concluded in this way comes back to where it started. A full-circle conclusion should not, however, repeat or summarize the thesis. Does this essay have a full-circle conclusion? If so, how exactly does it come full circle?




A third way to conclude an essay is by "taking the long view." This closer places the essay's major points within a larger context. This works well with personal essays, because it allows you to consider the significance of your own experience. If an essay begins with a thesis-opener and avoids closing by repeating or summarizing the thesis, it most likely will end with a "long-view conclusion." Does this essay have a long-view conclusion? If so, how does it present the long view?




If all else fails, you can end an essay with the punch line of the essay. This means you would save your best line for last. Does this essay have a punch-line ending? If so, what is the punch line?




Email your answers to your instructor.